Dreaming

Last night was my TOPS (Take Off Pounds Sensibly) meeting. I had a small loss which was a relief since Sunday (check out that day's entry) I had a scale scare and thought I was out of my leeway (more than 3 pounds above goal).

I think I mentioned in a previous post having feelings of guilt because I am struggling with being overweight and eating too much food when there are many people in this world who do not have enough food. By middle class America's standards I may not have a lot but I know that in comparison to many people I have an abundance. I think it was Chip Ingram who said that people who own their home are among only 5 percent of the world's population and even if that home doesn't seem grand it still makes the homeowner rich by the rest of the world's standards.

Joyce Meyer just wrote a book titled "Eat the Cookie...Buy the Shoes: giving yourself permission to lighten up". I discovered the promo on her website and the accompanying scripture from Ecclesiastes 3:12-13. "I know that there is nothing better for men than to be happy and do good while they live. That everyone may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all his toil-this is the gift of God." Pehaps it was providential that I saw Joyce's message when I have been struggling with this issue.

My feelings of guilt do not serve me or anyone else well. Sitting around having a pity party for myself does not feed the hungry. Nor does feeling guilty for having several bibles in my home when people risk their freedom and even their lives to have or give a bible.

I googled "With great priviledge comes great responsibility" and found many references to that statement. Eleanor Roosevelt said, "With freedom comes responsibility." As an American Christian I enjoy many freedoms and it is indeed a priviledge.

Jesus tells The Parable of the Talents in Matthew 25:14-30.

"Again, (the kingdom of heaven) will be like a man going on a journey, who called his servants and entrusted his property to them. To one he gave five talents of money, to another, two talents, and to another one talent, each according to his ability. Then he went on his journey. The man who had received the five talents went at once and put his money to work and gained five more. So also, the one with the two talents gained two more. But the man who had received the one talent went off, dug a hole in the ground and hid his master's money...."(Matt 25:14-18)

Notice that the talents were given according to each servant's ability. God does not ask more of us than we can handle. God gives us plenty of time to use the talents he has given us.
"After a long time the master of those servants returned and settled accounts with them..." (v. 19) The two servants who had invested wisely were acknowledged as good and faithful and were promised to have many things in their charge. But the one who buried his talent showed his true character by his selfish behavior. The master had not asked more of this servant than the servant could handle but yet this lazy man refused to do what was asked and was thrown out by the master.

As I wrote earlier, God has entrusted me with several bibles. Instead of feeling guilty for having what others do not, I can study His word and know Him better. Knowing God's word will help me to share it with others in whatever way God directs me. Perhaps my struggles with food will prepare me to help someone climb out of a rut that is keeping them from fulfilling their dream of being a nurse or a missionary. So I could see how my seemingly impracticle skills and interests could have an impact for God's kingdom.

In his book "The Dreamgiver" Bruce Wilkinson says that God puts a dream on each person's heart and that when we live out our dreams we meet another person's need. He gave the example of a child who froze to death on a street corner near where he, Bruce, was staying in Africa saying that somewhere in this world there is a person with a dream that would have met that child's need. When we tuck our dreams away and don't put them into action someone may actually suffer as a result. That certainly puts things in a different light.

I can see how my brother's dream of supplying pumps for wells in the country of Burundi in Africa meets the needs of impoverished people dying for lack of drinking water. I'm not sure how my dreams fit though.

I'll tell the story of my dream or what I think may be my dream. Several years ago I was listening to a radio broadcast from Focus on the Family. The program featured a recording of a woman speaking to a large group. I don't know who she was or what she was speaking about but I remember thinking, "I would like to do that someday." I immediately thought, "Are you crazy, you're terrified of public speaking." Sometime later I decided to go back to school where I was required to take a course in public speaking. One of the things that really stayed in my mind from that experience is the fact that people cannot usually tell that a speaker is nervous. I also learned how to write and deliver an effective speech. I have had some opportunities to speak and to teach and I've found that the teaching of God's word is different than speaking about my weight loss. I will need to learn more about that kind of speaking if that is what I am going to do.

Last summer I went to a TOPS conference that had over 2000 people in attendance. While listening to a couple of keynote speakers I thought, "I would like to do this too." I'm not sure how people get to the point where they can speak naturally in front of that many people and for an hour but I would like to find out. So when I think of the dream God has put on my heart I just keep thinking that I want to speak before large groups of people. "Is that God's dream or just a thought that goes through my head?" I don't know. I'll just keep pressing on and I trust that God will show me the way.

I am trying to use this time of rest that God has provided through the loss of work to spend time studying and using the gift of encouragement God has given me. "We have different gifts, according to the grace given us...if it is encouraging, let him encourage;"(Romans 12:6,8) I was so thrilled to find out encouragement is an actual gift listed in the bible. Not that every gift has to be listed in the bible to be legitimate but if it wasn't then I know I would question if it was a gift and discount my use of it. I guess God knew that we encouragers would need His encouragement to use our gift. I didn't even realize I had this gift until after I lost the weight and had some confidence.